My Need for Faith

I've noticed how easy it is to spiral. To look at our tangled, stressful lives and try to analyse and unpick the mess that we find ourselves in. We try to be mediators in our relationships, perfectionists in our work, Buddha in our rest and effective users of time. Why are we so surprised at the relentlessness of life? Why do we put ourselves under so much pressure? Why do we give in to this exhausting circle of life? I swear the clock ticks faster everyday, I'm certain my to-do list increases and that bright, heavenly light on which I thumb tack my hopes and aspirations grows dimmer and dimmer.

I think that perhaps I'm just a hopeless case, that I am unqualified for this job of life and that I should just plunk myself in the corner of a well-cushioned room with a novel and just shut everything else out. We all marvel at how fast the seasons pass, how old we are getting, how big the kids are growing,. New generations are taking to the community stages and filling up the school halls with their fancy iphones that we could only have dreamed about when we were their age. The metaphorical umbilical cord that used to pull us back to the next is growing longer and longer and we suddenly wonder how we drifted so far from home, from that safety net of routine and regular meals.

And yet, this is all on ground level and I am forgetting that I am merely a pawn in a much greater and better plan. I am not called or created to be my own master, for I will surely fail. My life is too much for me: too beautiful, too busy, too manic, too gorgeous, too blessed.

This is why I MUST have faith in something greater than myself.

1 comment :