Apologies for the serious absence of blogs. I've had so many good ideas that all seem to be stuck in my journal as 'working progresses'. However this particular blog demanded an element of urgency seeing as its contextual significance is fleeting. For those of you who are unaware, I'm off on another little jolly tomorrow. It sounds pretty quaint and cultural, but in my reality the whole thing is less of a jolly and more of a big scary leap of faith. I'm going to Milan. That might not sound particular terrifying, but let me expand: I'm going to Milan, by myself to volunteer at the YWAM base, working and staying with people I have NEVER met, in a city I have NEVER been to, attempting to communicate in a language of which my ability consist of a mere smattering of generic phrases and random subjunctive conjugations. AH SCARY.
If you had spoken to me about this a couple of days ago, I would have fallen silent (totally out of character!) or perhaps mumbled a few corny christian phrases about how 'God's got it' etc. when inside it felt like my stomach was about to soar out of my mouth. I think the aspect of the trip that was crippling me the most is the fact that I have NO IDEA what I'm going to be doing out there. I'm not used to this. I'm Ellie Jackson of the lists, routines and overburdened schedules. When I go somewhere, I go there with a purpose, with a sense of direction and with some form of preparation tucked under my arm. But today as I was cheerfully packing and ruthlessly tidying my room, I had a little revelation and now I'm really excited. I'm seeing this trip as a challenge, a challenge to trust God completely. I'm not quite sure how this whole thing got from a cheeky email saying 'Hi, I'm learning Italian, I love Jesus, please let me stay' to an actual REAL-LIFE plane ticket and plan - but I'm sure He does.
So I'm excited. I'm excited because ANYTHING could happen this week, or alternatively NOTHING could happen this week. I might be stomping through the streets of Italy's fashion capital telling people about Jesus, or I might be roaming around the pavements eating gelato and pondering big DEEP thoughts. This is my act of obedience and I have enough experience of God to know that he'll honour that. I'm going to attempt to give you a daily update via ipod touch (WOAH TECHNOLOGY) but that may not be feasible. Please would you pray for me, because amidst my fresh enthusiasm there is still that pant-wetting fear and I would really really love for this week to be significant and fruitful. MUCH LOVE.
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