Honour Spotlight: Kate Moreton

I have wanted to write one of these about Kate for a long time, probably from the moment I met her actually, but as always time and life got the better of me. More importantly I didn't feel like I knew her well enough to do her justice, but recently I've come to the conclusion that there is no such thing as knowing someone well ENOUGH, it is never enough, there is always more to learn. So here it is, why I love Kate from what I know of her and how she has impacted me so far. (I'm taking this moment now to put in a request to know her even better. Thanks.)

Firstly, Kate fascinates me. She may come across as intimidating but that's only because she is probably infinitely more interesting that you. And I love that, it challenges me. I recently read a couple of chapters of Captivating, a book about how women are created in God's image and so much of it rings true for Kate. She may not be a girly girl but she is a fiercely feminine woman of God.

There are many layers to Kate, one moment she is throwing banter (that rivals any man's) across the chaplaincy, then she might be viewing the world quietly and reflectively through her camera lens (she takes AWESOME photos!), or she might be leading a bible-study at SLOBS using REVELS (visual and nutritional aids - love 'em), or perhaps she'll be tying packets of Lovehearts to verses about guarding your heart to put on pillows, she might be running a CU weekend away, seamlessly, effortlessly and pretty much single handedly, or maybe participating in a weekend away, or she might be whizzing around on her bike or sitting in Boston Tea Party churning out wisdom to two very lost and tired cousins over iced tea.

Kate's the sort of person you can laugh with, the person you can guarantee will have brilliant ideas, the friend you can discuss theology and life with, without the fear of being shot down. In the time I have know her she has encouraged me, looked out for me, made me think about my position in life, inspired me to read my bible and forced me to buy Fairtrade chocolate (I'M ON A STUDENT BUDGET!!)

That's another thing, she has a massive heart for social justice. And she walks the talk. She doesn't churn out generic phrases to guilt-trip us all, she lives it day in, day out. It's not just third world poverty that makes her stomach churn, she is equally as passionate and gets equally angry at the poverty on the streets of Bristol - a challenge for all of us.

For me Kate is a great role model. I love it when she is open with me because I get to catch a glimpse of her inner workings and I feel so honoured and excited to know her. She has also been a companion for me in my grief, although we rarely talk about it, there is a silent peace and reassurance in knowing that she has some idea of my pain. There have been times, often in my darkest moments when she has texted me a verse that has restored my fragile faith and stopped me from feeling frightened.

Everyone who know Kate really well cherishes her. I have had numerous conversations where we have just gushed about how great Kate is. So this is a post to remind her that we love her and never, ever want to take her for granted.

P.S Kate, if you're reading this, don't hate me.

July 14th: The Day of Friendship.

Last Thursday marked the year anniversary of my friend's death. The day wasn't an explosive landmark, but rather a quiet and confused realisation at how fleeting our lives are. Even though the day celebrated her memory it was centred more around the idea of friendship than grief. What I mean is that as much as I loved Annie and as much as I still love her, I was more overwhelmed by how much the day was a testament to true friendship and godly fellowship than by how much I missed her.

Since her death people's lives have changed. We have taken faith more seriously, some of us have moved to new cities, started university, started internships, some of us have started businesses, we have begun and ended relationships, we've been baptised, booked plane tickets to go and follow our dreams: we have been massively pushed out of our comfort zones.

Grief is a very personal thing, in that it can be monstrously self-indulgent and terribly lonely, so gathering together was a great way to take our eyes of ourselves, put our arms around each other and fix our gaze on Jesus. The whole day was spent with people who knew her well. In the evening we gathered at the Wade's to chat, eat and watch the DVD shown at her funeral. There was laughter at baby Annie with her wide eyes and blonde hair and knowing smiles at the photos taken more recently. Then we gathered in the garden to worship God together, singing and praying in the setting sunlight. It was beautiful, but real and awkward. There was a disaster moment with a lantern that, instead of going upwards into the open air, decided to go sideways into a tree threatening to burn the street down. But that's how these things should be. Imperfect.

One of the highlights of the evening was spending time with and praying for Annie's parents, Bill and Anne. Their faith and attitude to life is the most humbling and inspiring thing to encounter. It was so right to spend the evening with them.

I ended the day in the recently refurbished Mcdonalds at Millpond with Grace. We sat on the wide seats by the window, scoffing our chips, avoiding chavs and chatting about her upcoming Australia adventure. It's then that the whole friendship thing got to me. I am so proud of us, our group of friends, for moving forward, for seizing life by the shoulders, for continuing and strengthening our relationship with Jesus, for supporting each other, for taking risks and for not being afraid to love fiercely and deeply all over again. We lay ourselves bare with each other over and over again, pursuing relationships that are prodded and pushed with accountability so that our deepest fears and struggles can be exposed without judgement. I love them so fiercely.

One of the last texts Annie ever sent me was 'Thank you for letting me be myself around you xx' and it's one of the things that I cling to when I think about friendship because we really did love and accept each other for who we were and who we were going to be. I guess that's why her absence rocks my world so much. But the thing is, she's no longer the only one to be this sort of friend to me, as a result of her death I have been more determined to tie strings of friendship that will last a lifetime. I have friends who love me at my worst, hug me in my ugliest moments and celebrate, without jealousy, my best moments and most deliriously happy seasons. A lot of people feel sorry for me when I tell them about Annie, I understand why and I appreciate their sympathy, but really you should all envy me because I have experienced friendship that is intimate, fun and god filled before AND after her death, and let me tell you, it's one of the greatest things in the world.

30th June - Bristol Love

It's 4:15am and after lying awake frustrated for the last two hours I figured it would be more productive to get up and eat some cereal. So here I am sat on the kitchen counter, eating whole earth organic cornflakes (naturally gluten free) drinking Sainsbury's basics orange juice and looking out over Bristol.

As of 3am this morning I am the only remaining resident on Floor 5 and boy do I feel it. It's not so much the loneliness but more the sense of finality that gets to me. So far I've avoided eating alone everyday this week by begging people to help me finish my leftovers- this has been incredibly successful!

I just don't want to leave this city that has made me so happy. I can't face packing up the room that I have lovingly fashioned into my own. I know it sounds a little overdramatic but as I sit here munching away and watching the sunrise over the buildings, I am more in love with this city than I ever have been. It's the home I have made for myself and filled with the family I have chosen. And yes I know I'll be back in September but that's a two month Boston-tea party-Stokes-Croft-Clifton-Village vacuum that, for the moment, doesn't bare thinking about.

Furthermore, the sun has risen on my last day as a resident in Manor Hall. I have loved every minute of my time here: I love it's character, the sense of community and its sense of fun. The people here have charmed me with their quirks and individual passions and I've thoroughly enjoyed watching us all develop, slowly growing out of the nicknames and jokes we were branded with during Fresher's Week. It's been great to colour in the blanks of people's personalities , to spend time learning about their lives over tea, coffee, angel-delight, chilli fries and library desks. The kitchen, apart from the glorious view, is a bit scabby, I mean the radiator just fell off the wall and there are lady birds everywhere and then there's the tiny shower and the two baths that have been used about once or twice throughout the year, but its been my home and my community and I'm going to miss it terribly.

Ah! There's the sun. I'm sat here overwhelmed with nostalgia at my memories of first year, sadness at the concept of leaving tomorrow and excited because I get to come back in September and do it all again.

Ci vediamo Bristol!