Welcome 2011.

Okay, so last night wasn't so awful, in fact it was pretty wonderful. Anna and I decided to stop faffing and get everyone together, we originally planned a Mean Girls party with costumes, pink food, trivia, a viewing of the film and, of course, lots of Jingle Bell Rock dance routines. However, when people turned up it was clear no one had got the 'dress-up' or even the THEME memo so we ended up just chillin and chatting till New Year rolled in after which we read out the rather original, mostly comical resolutions we had written for each other and set off lanterns on the field at the back of my house. It was just good to be together.

So it's New Year, I should probably make some resolutions - get thinner, grow hair, buy less clothes, do more work, be more cheerful - meh! How generic. Most of those I will struggle and ultimately fail to keep because a) my hair hates me b) clothes literally claw at my face until I buy them c) Gilmore Girls, Facebook and Selective Potential will always be watched, checked and read before any work is achieved and d) Sometimes, I like having a snotty, puffy face.

In all seriousness I have one thing I would like to, not achieve, but focus on this year. I want to quieten my mind and feel more at peace with myself and the situations I will find myself in over the following months. I have three activities which I believe will help me in my quest to feel more zen and they are:

1) Journalling. I want to journal more regularly. Journalling is the outlet for my inner monologue, performed by the crazy, nutter in my head that never seems to stop or shut up. My mind is a constant hum and buzz of ideas, insecurities, fears, anxiety, routines and song lyrics wrapped around a montage of memories that when initiated will play at full-speed across my forehead. Perhaps by writing things down I will stop the noise, decipher the confusion in my thoughts and actually get some sleep.

2) Be open with people. I have been blessed with some incredible friends, role models and mentors in my life. This year, I mustn't be afraid of picking up the phone, or running down the road to knock on their doors. Nor must I feel ashamed of crying my guts out on the floor in their presence. I will not resist their hugs or their kindness. They say a problem shared is a problem halved - I want to see whether this is true.

3) Make spending time with God a priority. This pretty much speaks for itself. It doesn't mean attend every single church and CU meeting and go on every conference and christian holiday available. Instead it's inviting me to make time to sit in my arm chair with a cup of tea and just rest in his presence. It means reading my Bible as much as possible, it means thanking him, it means offloading all my emotional junk in his direction and it means trusting in him, even when trusting an invisible God seems like lunacy.

Finally, here's to another chance to take as many unflattering photos as possible, to add loads more people you don't know on Facebook, procrastinate, to delete loads of people you don't know on Facebook, to wear awful 'fashionable' clothes, to do even MORE revision, to make another attempt at sorting out your messy bedroom and of course embarrass yourself beyond measure...

only kidding! Hope you have a wonderfully positive start to this beautiful New Year that we've been given.

love

Ellie x